Father Abraham had many fears

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Indulge me - please sing with me….

Father Abraham had many fears,

Many fears had Father Abraham,

I know some of them.

And so do you.

So let’s just talk them out.

One lie…..

Two lies…..

Father Abraham had many fears…..

Yup it is true. That man, our father of faith, was still beset with fears. So how could a man, so graced with faith, have fear?

Here is a man, who has talked to God one on one. Here is a man, who has promises from God. Here is a man, who has translated this faith in his God, packed up his family, chattels and possessions, and walked out of his known home, the land of his fathers, started a journey into the great big bad world, into where God will show him, to take it into possession, for himself and his descendants - as numerous as the stars - with a barren, but beautiful wife to boot. Total obedience. Faith in action. Trust.

Abraham believed in God. He believed in God’s promises to him. What fears could he possibly have had?

What is fear by the way? Google response is, an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm. The synonyms are many. Fear has many names, to describe its unpleasantness. Fear is a feeling -which sometimes is evidenced by action.

How did this work with Abraham. He lied. About his wife - not being his wife. Recorded twice in the bible – could have been more times that are unrecorded. Strange huh?

What led him to tell this lie? What was his thought process, his feelings in these instance? Would he have used any of the words above to describe his unpleasant emotions?

Consider, that a major factor in the fulfillment of God’s promises to Abraham were linked to his having offspring, and thus on his having a wife. Did he think that if he let go off his wife, and he averted the danger he thought he was in, at least he would still be alive, and perhaps a new wife would be availed to him to bear offspring with? Did he think that he needed to save his own life for the sake of the promises? Did it mean that after trusting God, giving up all he had given up, doing all he had done, he could not let God get him out of his presenting troubles at each point?

The promise was alive. Very alive to Abraham. He knew because God had said it, it was true, and would happen. He had faith in God. But still. But yet. Disquiet. Not peace.

What was the source of Abraham’s lack of peace? Where did Abraham get his fear from? Experience? What experiences? Who had been killed before, so his beautiful wife would be snatched up? Had anyone tried to kill Abraham before, because of his beautiful wife? I do not know. He knew death happened for people had died. And when they were dead, the bore no descendants. Fear of premature death? Far greater than the faith he had of what he was promised? Of the promises not being fulfilled? Of all he had trothed all for naught?

What leads me to my fears? Which of my experiences have led me here? Am I willing to go into my experiences, into my past and find the cause?

Mothers of Sons – a workbook I am working through, says, “Problems or challenges have roots and shoots. Sometimes we focus on the fruit hanging on the shoots and do nothing about the roots. Identify the root of your problems and deal with it. Learning, or unlearning from the past, the roots is important.”

A person I care about once told me, “I am not going back into the past. I cannot go back into the past. The past is gone and doesn’t matter now.” Yet they were and still are visibly struggling with issues from their past, their experiences, that are roots to their problems today, so that they are unable to function optimally in their life. So that they are making decisions and coping out of fear.

Fear. Of death. Of current perception of self.

Fear. Of death. Of goals? Promises?

I wonder if Abraham ever gained freedom from that fear, found peace, as he grew into the name God had called him to – from Abram to Abraham. I’m sure he did. For despite it all, Abraham believed the Lord, and God credited it to him as righteousness [Genesis 15:6 NIV].

I am in good company.

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